Reviews and Teasers

Bar Jokes

People are always warning you about stuff – do not do drugs, do not smoke, do not drive drunk – all this looking out for you stuff., But there is one very serious hazard people do not mention – don’t make “bar” jokes. I am living proof that practical jokes can get out of hand. I mean it started out innocent enough. Pinhead, this buddy of ours, got stinking drunk and passed out about two months ago. So, we took him to a city park and spray painted him grey, and set him on a picnic table. He came to the next morning and thought he had turned into a statue.  Scared him silly. He did not move for about three days. It was pretty funny but in military terms, it was just the opening salvo.


Next, Junior Meeker passes out one night and we strip him naked, pay for a cab, load him in and tell the cab driver to put him out in front of city hall. You heard. of drunk and disorderly. Well, Junior was drunk and disrobed.  You see it was getting to be a little serious. Last week we put Doug Meeker’s carcass in a dumpster out behind the bar.  It would have been a lot funnier if we had not forgotten about him and that garbage truck had not come around and compacted him to the size of an overweight midget.


And this weekend I guess it was my turn. Yeah, I passed out and they put my name on a tag and taped it to my big toe and then snuck me into the city morgue. Let me say again – Do Not do dangerous bar. Jokes on your friends.  They can get out of hand. Trust me I have the autopsy scars to prove it. Wake Up America!

Earl Pitts “Bar Tales”


“Earl Pitts Bar Tales” Track List

1) Drinking Wounds
2) Table in a Bar
3) Beer and Women
4) Wine List
5) Strawberry Daiquiri
6) Speaking French
7) Bar Jokes
8) Topless Bar Job
9) The Dilemma
10) Bathroom Questions
11) Drinking and Walking
12) Dolphins
13) Exotic Drinks
14) Biker Bar?